Stress is a part of everyone's everyday lives... some of us have more than our share of "stress" and for my part I know I do contribute to my own stress levels rising and falling.  I've just never quite worked out how to keep it in check.  Consequently, my energy levels and moods rollercoaster at times.   When I'm surging full of energy, the stress propels into action and I achieve amazing things. When I look back, especially the essays I've written for my classes, I barely recall writing them.  I guess you call that "inspired writing".

However, right now my stress is spiralling upwards with presentations looming and little started.  As Bob says, you operate best when you have the deadline staring you in the face.  Very true, but I have no control over external events which always seem to  pop up when I'm attempting to achieve my usual dash for the finish line at lightning speed.

Juggling home remodelling - which is now 95% complete (just trim to put up in the dining room and regrouting the bathroom floors), preparing the home to sell - that is pretty much done also, just have to remove the "clutter" sort into boxes of trash and keep.  At the same time, applying for new teaching positions in Austin (one interview done and the most important one coming).  The house construction is finally on its way - the excavations are completed and the slab should be poured in the next couple of weeks.  But there's no way it will be built by the end of the summer - so the stress of knowing I will be in temporary accommodations is simply "uuggghhh".  Somehow in all this I have to keep my focus on my Graduate Studies and I have two presentations - one this week which is semi-started and one in another week.  Two finals and then a brief break before my next two classes begin for the Summer Session.

Still I have my classes I teach and they are very stressful as I care about my students' progress and it is not easy dealing with situations without much support from the Administration.  Particularly bothersome and disturbing is the treatment of one of my students who has cerebral pawsy, my concerns have been at best considered "over-reaction" and at worst "being suckered by the student, he's fake crying" - yet I was right:  The student's screams of pain were real HE HAD A BROKEN LEG and it was left like that for two days!   I can't begin to imagine the pain he suffered.   Sometimes I think am I the only one AWAKE and noticing something is not right??????  But I'm glad I stubbornly put myself out there for my students and say, something needs to be done about this. 

Yesterday I took action and went straight to the Principal with my concerns about the same student's behavior arriving to my class screaming - I can distinguish the difference between "cries of pain" and "cries for attention".   His communication device is a Dynavox - which seems so outdated, surely there could be something better for him.  He finally calmed down enough and wrote on it SOMETIMES I FEEL IGNORED WHEN I'M IN LIFESKILLS - unfortunately I didn't see the rest of his message it was erased before I could read it.  The teacher aide is awful with them, threatening him with office referrals if he doesn't stop crying. It made my blood boil.

I called my Department Head and expressed my concerns that the student is being prejudged - there is something wrong he hasn't come into class upset like this previously. Yet the past week he is deeply disturbed and in pain. His parents wrote me a long email stating the change they see in their son since his leg was broken.  I questioned the use of the leg restraints being used for his new wheelchair - and thankfully it is being looked at!!!!!

However, this all takes a toll on my energy levels and fighting for my students' rights.  Another student is a third year 9th grader.   That in itself is very troubling - no wonder students drop out if they aren't progressing to see the light at the end of the tunnel!!!!!!!!!  I raised that with the Principal and A.P. over Special Ed.   It just seems neverending, and nothing much seems to happen in terms of progress with the system changing so slowly or not at all to accommodate the students' real needs.

Now that I have vented this morning, I'm ready to attack the day with gusto.  This morning I have renewed energy and nothing will get me down.  All in all, at least the progress I make with my students, I can see a real difference.  I think I have the repeating 9th Grader in my hand - she's open to believing its possible for her to graduate. 

More to write by the end of the week...am too busy to daily write.  The next couple of months are going to be crunchtime.  I can get through it    Bob is a great support, even though we are two hundred miles apart.  He's only a phone call away and by the end of the summer we'll be at last living in the same house.